Menopause and how your Attitude matters
What
about our feelings?
I've noticed that there are many articles about the physical symptoms of the menopause and how to deal with them, but what about the many feelings that come up, often of fear and confusion, when this major 'change' starts happening?
I know from my own experience that when your emotions are all over the place due to hormonal imbalances, the last thing you need is to be patronised, because lets face it, only a woman of a certain age could possibly know what you're actually going through.
The
menopause is not an illness
One of the main things to remember, (no matter what your GP says), is that the menopause is not an illness, it's a hormonal imbalance just like you find during puberty. Unfortunately in our society there is a lot of emphasis on the downsides of menopause. It's as if something terrible is going to happen and you'll never be a proper woman again.
Why does the menopause have such bad press?
Unfortunately, over the years the menopause has been seen as something to dread, when in fact this time could be viewed as a point in a woman's life where she has many years of healthy living ahead, more independence if she has been bringing up children and no more periods!
Finding what you really want
I hadn't really gone for a career that I absolutely wanted, it had been more about compromises to fit in with my partner, probably because I hadn't the confidence to stick up for what I really wanted.
Whereas from forty onwards I started to gain far more confidence and by the time menopause was looming I was ready for change and in fact re-trained in something that I really wanted to do.
Independence at last
For
women who have been bringing up children for many years, this can often be a time
of new independence and freedom, rather than trying to hang on to the 'mother'
role.
The same goes for partners. During the ten years I've been helping women
through the menopause it has often been a revolutionary time for them regarding
changing attitudes towards their husbands.
When you've been the person cooking and cleaning for a whole family for so many years, it can take a while to think; wait a minute, I don't have to have that role anymore. We can share the chores. Ah, freedom!
Feeling invisible?
We live in a society where older people generally are not treated with a great deal of respect. I've heard the phrase: 'I feel invisible' many times.
In some cultures, however, the older, wise woman is revered and held in great esteem. Maybe partly because menopause in these cultures is not seen as a bad thing. The result seems to be that many of these women simply do not suffer the physical and emotional symptoms that often plague women in the West.
So let's respect ourselves and not take on board all the fear-led rubbish in the media because lets face it, if in some cultures they end up feeling empowered by the whole experience, then so can we. Let's be proud to be very very visible!!.
For
more details about how our attitudes help and also about how female friendships
actually help our stress levels, an important factor during menopause - please
see the
E Book -: The Menopause - What Every Woman Needs to Know